words Chitra Panjabi
As we all head into the year of the pig, we could tell you just to eat healthy and exercise more but even we’re sick of old advice often given. So we asked Teren Lam, protégé of Feng Shui Master Peter So, what each animal of the Chinese horoscope should expect this year. He did his crystal ball thing and also told us Master So developed a cold-and-hot cycle theory for each year – it’s simple, if you are born from March 5 to August 7, you’re a hottie and from August 8 to March 4 you’re part of the cold cycle. We hope you’re in the hot cycle – the porcine year will be better for you.
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Pig
(1935, 1947, 1959, 1971, 1983, 1995, 2007)
Sorry grunters we know it’s your year, but you are not going to root out many truffles in 2007. Actually the Tai Sui (Tai Sui – the Grand Duke of Jupiter, an intangible star which can affect one’s fortune according to feng shui theory) will probably make you feel like you’re living in a coal chamber most of the year, so take some time out for a bit of fun, though don’t go foraging in the northeast where, we’ve been told, the earth is going to give itself a good shake this year. Mind you, we can’t guarantee it’s not going to heave around in the southeast, southwest or northwest either, so you might as well just stay at home and snuffle around sharing worries with your friends. For cold cycle porkers the news is all change, change, change – be ready for a piggy-go-round in your love life, career and sties. Master Lam says stay cool – you just gotta grunt and be patient.
Famous pigs:
Liu Xiang, Lisa Wang, Lydia Shum, Stephy Tang, Woody Allen, Hilary Rodham Clinton, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Lee Kuan Yew
Rat
(1936, 1948, 1960, 1972, 1984, 1996, 2008)
You know what they say – if it isn’t the year of the cat, the rats turn into property tycoons. 2007 is forecast to be all good for you rodent types – but only if you put in the hard yards. Yeah, we know you’re the kind that prefers to curl your tail around your nose and let the mice bring you the cheese, but if you think about riding in your personalized Beema to your penthouse apartment with its own swimming pool and movie theatre, 4you might just be persuaded to get onto the treadmill and turn HK into the City of the Rats. But rodents on the cold cycle had better do it now – in the second half of the year your bank balance looks a little thin. Probably because you spent everything on having such a good time in the first half!
Famous rats: Al Gore, Diego Maradona, Scarlett Johansson, Ben Affleck, Sammi Cheng
Ox
(1937, 1949, 1961, 1973, 1985, 1997)
Now, normally oxen have to work really hard for not much comeback – you know, they’re the guys who pull the plough all day and get a kick and curse for it at night. Not this year. All you horny – oops, horned – beasts are in for a year of just the opposite: you can sit back and chew the cud and for once all those puny humans will treat you like you have gold between your ears – especially if you are in the hot cycle. It’ll be a good time for butting your wealth into some good investments. Those in the cold shouldn’t make any fixed plans about staying in the same paddock all year – the movement in your stars says you will probably be changing jobs a few times.
Famous oxen: Tung Chee-hwa, Peter Jackson, Jacky Cheung, Anthony Wong Chau-sang, Andy Lau, Takeshi Kaneshiro
Tiger
(1938, 1950, 1962, 1974, 1986, 1998)
Usually no one wants to get near a tiger unless they’re really into losing their arms or legs but this year everyone will want to get close to you striped kitties. Yes, 2007 is the year of the relationship for you – you might not know what to do with all the friends, co-workers, classmates and even lovers that just want to rub your fur and hear you purr. Perhaps you’ve been toying with the idea of getting into a bit of feline business? Well, this will be the best year for it: a lucky star hangs over you and if you don’t go roaring into it too loudly and scare the nose hairs off your clients, lots of influential people will want to get before the eye of the tiger. However, investment will not be so good for the cats on the cold cycle – they would do better to enroll in a course and learn a thing or two. No, not just how to jump on a barrel when somebody cracks a whip, guys! Sheesh!
Famous tigers: Kofi Annan, Christian Bale, Daniel Wu, Tom Cruise, Stephen Chow, Jiang Zemin
Rabbit
(1939, 1951, 1963, 1975, 1987, 1999)
We all know that any year is a good year for rabbits who like breeding (and which don’t) but 2007 is better for market gardening for you long-eared hoppers. Well, actually, any business looks good for you, though only if you take it easy and don’t try to gobble too many of the carrots all at once. A slow steady approach will pay dividends – and preserve your waistline. Remember that story about your ancestor who thought he could hop rings around a tortoise and still win the race? Well, get the same idea and you could land up a rabbit in a snake farm rather than a bunny with your own veggie patch. This is especially true for those of you who were born in the cold – Master Lam says take it easy, learn some new skills (like how to invest) and you’ll outrun the dogs all year round.
Famous rabbits: Jet Li, Johnny Depp, Fidel Castro, Brad Pitt, Donnie Yen, David Beckham, Chen Shui-bian
Snake
(1941, 1953, 1965, 1977, 1989, 2001)
Snakes just like to slide along – and those under this sign are going to have to do a lot of that in 2007. Due to the Tai Sui, you may feel as though you are out in the desert in a sandstorm and need all your slithering skills to keep from being buried by the changing landscape. You will get another job (or three), you’ll part from your partner(s) and you’ll make house-moving companies very rich and happy this year. Normally snakes can take the heat but if you were born in the hot cycle, you’re about to get stir-fried. Not that it’ll be much easier for cold-cycle slitherers – things will be moving so fast, you’ll end up exhausted before breakfast. Master Lam says keep your head down, look after your health and be kind to your elders. And be ready to shed skin half a dozen times.
Famous snakes: Wang Dan, Gong Li, Eric Tsang, Oprah Winfrey, Shania Twain
Horse
(1942, 1954, 1966, 1978, 1990, 2002)
Racing for a living? Forget it. It’s the year for Clydesdales – those equine plodders who keep going hour after hour, day after day, week after week… Yep, it’s all slog for horses in the year of the pig – but the results may be quite impressive. Okay, so you may not win the Hong Kong Mile but you’ll pull more carts out of swamps than a Mac truck on steroids. Not that anybody will really notice, if you were born in the cold cycle. They’ll probably just give you a slap on the rump like you are a horse with no name, and take you to the next impossible task. But don’t get mad, plan for a long stay on a Californian beach sometime during the year, and you’ll be as happy as Neddy with a nosebag, the folks back home will realize their mistake and you could arrive back to a stable with hot and cold running oats.
Famous horses: Warren Buffet, Kim Jong-Il, Richard Li, Karen Lam, Jackie Chan
Goat
(1943, 1955, 1967, 1979,
1991, 2003)
Mmm… head butters are going to have all the fun this year. You’ll be getting everything you want without even having to baa for it. Nobody will pull your beard, you’ll be able to eat as many socks as you want and work will be like jumping on and off a low rock. Travel? No sweat! You can see the world this year – and not from the back of a cattle truck either. Only trouble is, you might get so carried away you think you can butt your boss up his butt and that’ll put a sudden end to your year-long Christmas. Don’t get carried away, keep your horns to yourself and, as the man says, you’ll be The G.O.A.T – the Greatest Of All Time. At least for a year.
Famous goats: Bill Gates, Rupert Murdoch, Julia Roberts, Zhang Zi-yi, Chow Yun-fat, Jonnie To, Nicole Kidman
Monkey
(1944, 1956, 1968, 1980, 1992, 2004)
Hey, we’re getting out of here – it’s banana drama among the monkey folk. The Tai Sui has got monkeys by the short hairs and are they going to argue! Nit picking, bickering and squabbling over everything and nothing – and they’ll probably throw things as well. Advice to monkeys is to concentrate on communication this year and don’t take work squibs back home – they are likely to self-ignite. Okay, so you were never very good at taking advice so ignore us and the omens say you’ll get something to really shock the monkey – a whole string of lawyers’ letters and court cases. Meanwhile the chills will creep into all your simian relationships, especially if you were born in the cold cycle. Sound like one bad anno? Doesn’t have to be. Be nice to the folks at home, and at work just try to keep your monkey mind on one thing at a time, do it well and chances are you’ll end up on a higher branch of the corporate tree than when you started. And your partner might get to actually liking you again.
Famous monkeys: Bob Marley, Nicholas Tse,
Edison Chen, Annette Lu Hsiu-lien
Rooster
(1945, 1957, 1969, 1981, 1993, 2005)
Roosters, you have got something to crow about this year, seeing as the predictions are for promotions and pay rises. But it won’t be all cock-of-the-walk for you – feathers are set to fly. Well, what can you expect, a harem is a harem is a hen fight and the predictions indicate the air will be a tad disturbed around you. Still, you are the type to keep your cool even among the worst of squawks and there is lots of opportunity to get away from it all and travel this year. It’s the worst for cold-cycle cockerels – the promotion you get could lead to a major fowl-up and even land up in the courts. Which thought may wilt your wing feathers, but don’t despair – you have some good friends around you to help you through and if you treat yourself to a bit of a vacation, you’ll soon be one happy red rooster again.
Famous roosters: Aung San Suu Kyi, Stanley Ho, Faye Wong, Shawn Yue
Dog
(1946, 1958, 1970, 1982, 1994, 2006)
Yeah, it was a bitch of a year for dogs last year, but out of the dirt box some new aromas are arising. Things will perk up for dogs in 2007 and all those drooping tails should be upright and springy again by the end of the year. We sniff some very interesting developments in canines’ love lives as the year goes on – with a distinct possibility of marriage for some. Actually we can’t smell any doggy-doo scents at all for this year – work, study, finances… whatever you’re involved in should turn out well. So keep your spirits up, chase some happy balls with your friends and family and you can say goodbye to all those 2006 mean dog blues.
Famous dogs: George W. Bush, Madonna, John Woo, Tony Leung Ka-fai, David Bowie, Stephen Spielberg, Charlene Choi
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