Everyone involved with Yes Man should have said no to the project. Don't make the same mistake.

Jim Carrey should have said no to the threadbare script. He has shown he could wring laughs out of one-note pitches like Bruce Almighty, Liar, Liar, or the Ace Ventura films but the three credited Yes Man screenwriters cook up the flimsiest comedic premise of Carrey's career – a non-committal loan officer enters a motivational program that prevents him from turning anything down – then forget to back it up with humour, emotional conflict or, you know, a plot.

And the 46-year-old comedian really should have said no to the casting of adorable, doe-eyed Zooey Deschanel as his free-spirited love interest. Ironically, these two share a birthday – January 17. But it's separated by 18 years. I'm not suggesting Deschanel is young enough to play Carrey's daughter in a film... maybe his niece? Either way, the age difference renders their Yes Man romance implausible. And creepy.

But that's consistent with the rest of director Peyton Reed's unfocused string of unfeasible situations and warmed-up stock Carrey bits. Perhaps you still roar when the comedian manipulates his rubbery face into a Quasimodo mask using Scotch tape. Or maybe you've longed for the day when Carrey would serenade a suicidal Luis Guzman with the Third Eye Blind song, Jumper. I'm not even sure that would have been funny 11 years ago, when the song first came out. And yes, the crowd gathered on the street below does join in for a sing-along chorus, because Reed never misses the opportunity to hammer home an obvious joke.
Since you won't be laughing at the film's lame skits, you have plenty of time to ask a series of questions. Does the great Fionnula Flanagan so desperately need work that she'll agree to play a horny landlord who pops her teeth out before performing oral sex on Carrey and his friends? Have you seen more shameless product placement this year than the advertisements-in-a-movie crammed into Yes Man? Does Warner feel a little dirty hawking its Harry Potter and 300 franchises in this laughless dud? And importantly, would any of the events unfolding in Yes Man ever happen in real life? Contrary to the title, the answer is no.

Sean O'Connell