bc magazine

Chinese Police Advice on How Not to Get Raped

The local Public Security Bureau for Wuhan University published a quite extraordinary list of ways to avoid getting raped, which was then republished by Sina Guangdong.

So, to avoid being having your dignity taken away, here are nine suggestions from a Chinese police authority:

Translations courtesy of thenanfang.com

1: Don’t take illegal cabs. (If you do,) get into the habit of memorising the license plate. Sit in the back seat, and pretend to make a call.
Woman on phone: “Husband, come out and pick me up! The license plate of the car is xxx”.

2: Carry a small spray bottle that contains Fengyoujing (a medicated balm lotion), and spray it into the eyes of any attacker.

3: Throw your wallet somewhere far away instead of passing it over to the attacker.
Person throwing: Fly away!

4: If you want to take a picture of the bad man, you can pretend to be talking on the phone and surreptitiously record him by pointing the back of the phone towards him.
Be very careful using this one! If you are discovered doing this, you will die a grisly death.

5: Sometimes, teeth can be more effective than your own hands.
Cannibal: If you’re not careful, you’ll have eaten the attacker.

6: Cut your fingernails into this shape. A blunt cut is fine, don’t make them too long or else they may break unexpectedly.

7: Upon being raped*, you should defecate or urinate if you can, or stick your fingers down your throat to vomit.
An ordinary person will wilt at this sight.

8: Carry a pen on your person (with the exception of a lead pencil). This is more convenient than a knife because you are able to pass through a security checkpoint.

9: Be ugly; this is the safest way of all!

* The word “rape” is censored in Chinese

bc magazine issue 1- the first bcene… who do you know/remember?

20 Years Ago Today… bc magazine issue 1

Quite unbelievably it’s 20 years ago today that the first issue of bc magazine arrived from the printers. Over the years a lot of people have contributed to bc’s success and as publisher, I have been lucky enough to work with some amazing writers, designers, sales and do anything staff and enjoyed the support of lots of advertisers – without whom none of this would have been possible. Thank you!

RTHK Director Roy Tang opposes Freedom of Expression

All is not well at RTHK as Director Roy Tang demands the removal of ‘promoting freedom of expression and a democratic society’ from Producers Guidelines.

Here’s the original story in Chinese: 港台《製作人員守則》修訂鄧忍光要求刪去「促進言論自由、民主社會」段落. With a quick translation provided by reddit user wheeloffire:

Roy Tang ‘harmonises’ RTHK Guidelines, demands the deletion of ‘promoting freedom of expression and a democratic society’ RTHK, which has had some ‘harmonious misgivings’ several times in recent years, now has a new crisis. Post 852 has obtained an internal RTHK document showing that RTHK staff have recommended that administration amend the Producers’ Guidelines. However they were met with Broadcasting Director Roy Tang’s demand that the words ‘promoting freedom of expression, open and democratic society’ be removed from the revision. When Tang’s demand was met with opposition, he further rudely asserted his stance one by one to the administration at a meeting.

According to the document, the ‘harmonised version’ of the revision will be implemented unless additional action is taken. The RTHK Union criticised the decision-making process as crude and unreasonable and appealed to RTHK staff to help to turn the tide [in favour of the original revision].

Besides the Charter of RTHK, RTHK has ‘Producers’ Guidelines‘ (Guidelines) which serve as basis for the editorial staff’s operations. The Forward of the Guidelines states that RTHK codified their tried and tested programme editorial practices into the Guidelines to enhance the transparency and accountability of RTHK’s operation. The Guidelines reflected not only RTHK’s working principles but also social norms and standards.

As the Guidelines had been neither reviewed or revised since 2003 and thus may have become outdated in part, RTHK formed a representative working group last year with delegates from more than 20 different departments. It is Post 852‘s understanding is that it was chaired by Assistant Director of Broadcasting Tai Keen-man. The working group met more than 10 times since May 2013 to discuss and propose specific recommendations on revising the Guidelines.

Originally, this was to be a very simple affair, yet now the situation appears to have changed. Post 852 obtained a non-public document that the RTHK Programme Staff Union (Union) issued to RTHK staff and found that the Director of Broadcasting had brutally demanded deleting a section of the proposed revised text.

It’s said that working group had reached a consensus last year and proposed amendments to paragraphs in the first chapter of the Guidelines which referred to public broadcasting. The Union document provides the revised English language (item 1), translated by the newspaper as follows [here’s the original instead]:

‘As a public service broadcaster, RTHK pledges to uphold the core values of editorial independence and impartiality. We take public interest as the basis of our work. We share the values and missions of public broadcasters around the world, namely universality, diversity, independence and distinctiveness of programming. We promote freedom of expression, open and democratic society, civic participation and a caring community. We also pledge to serve the people, produce quality programmes, nurture talent, monitor any infringement of public interest, and retain the trust that the community has placed in us.’

No related definitions under UNESCO

However RTHK administration subsequently told the working group that they had reservations about the above proposed revision. They believed that the sentence ‘We promote freedom of expression, open and democratic society, civic participation and a caring community’ (the ‘Freedom of Expression sentence’) was not defined under United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization (UNESCO) for public broadcasters, and so they returned the revision back to the working group for further discussion.

The working group then held three meetings during which the group again consulted discourse on public broadcasting from UNESCO, Asia Pacific Institute for Broadcasting Development (AIB), and European Broadcasting Union (EBU). They found support for the core values of freedom of expression and open and democratic societies running throughout the organisational documents of major broadcasters and that it was in line with the international community’s understanding of public broadcasting. As a result, in November 2013 the working group unanimously carried the motion to retain the original proposed revision.

Post 852 looked at UNESCO’s website and found that, although UNESCO does not directly state that public broadcasters must promote democracy, it stresses that the public broadcasting ‘is vital to the functioning of democratic societies’ and ‘can serve as a cornerstone of democracy’ (note 2). In other words, according to the spirit of UNESCO, public broadcasting was originally also a tool to promote the development of democracy and it can be seen that the working group’s proposals were not unreasonable.

Relevant lines from UNESCO:
This brochure presents in a simple and direct style an entirely up-to-date summary of the basic concepts relating to public broadcasting, which is vital to the functioning of democratic societies.
When guaranteed with pluralism, programming diversity, editorial independence, appropriate funding, accountability and transparency, public service broadcasting can serve as a cornerstone of democracy.

link to reddit article: http://www.reddit.com/r/HongKong/comments/24iset/rthk_broadcasting_director_demands_the_deletion/

2014 – The Year of the Horse

What is it about horses? Enigmatic beasts of burden, we have for centuries been leading them to water and them not drinking. We’ve been closing stable doors after they’ve bolted, and been forbidden to look in a gift one’s mouth. We’ve been told to beware horses bearing gifts. Or is that Greeks? Perhaps it’s Greek horses. Since the invention of cars the horse’s ability to pull stuff has become seriously marginalized, to the point where their life expectancy now involves little more than being ridden around Happy Valley by camp midgets before ending up in a tube of Bostick. Yet this is no reason not to salute our fetlocked friends. Balance is the keyword this year. Do everything in moderation, except moderation itself, which you should do a lot of. Be prepared to do stuff you’re not happy about for the greater good. There will be frustrating times ahead, and it is a bad year to get married, but doesn’t that apply every year?

Horse
(1966, 1978, 1990, 2002, 2114)
“Horses: Motorcycles made of meat.”
This year you need to seize opportunities without delay, something that could be difficult with hooves. Unfortunately, also this year you will break your leg and be shot dead, but don’t worry as it’s for the best. That aside, in 2014 you have the potential to do really well in everything you try, which is nice. Don’t try scuba diving, mind, as horses can’t breathe through their mouths. Or swim. Anyone who claims to have seen a swimming horse is just pulling your leg – beware. Don’t allow minor setbacks to deter you in the next few months. Minor seatbacks are also best avoided, as you need plenty of lumbar support what, with your dodgy spine. Probably best to get it checked out by an expert. Either way, this should be a good year.

Sheep
(1955, 1967, 1979, 1991, 2003)
“The lion and the lamb will lie down together, but only one will get a good night’s sleep”
“As one year comes, another goes, swaying gently in time’s breeze, like a bogey up one’s nose, waiting for life’s sneeze.” For lucky sheep – though they look like nylon clouds with legs – life’s sneeze will chunder forth from the nose of opportunity this very year. Make no mistake; you will have a fantastic Year of the Horse, living it large and generally bigging it up. It will be a year of much fun, huge success and great opportunity. Try to avoid the sheep-esque hobby of following the sheep in front and instead go your own way. Though you look funny in fields, have lead to a whole barrage of Welsh-baiting jokes and provide enough wool to jumper the planet, do not overlook your worth as a mashed potato / mint sauce mealtime support act. To that end don’t make enemies and beware of wolves in sheep’s clothing. You’ll notice them as their trousers won’t fit properly.

Monkey
(1956, 1968, 1980, 1992, 2004)
“I believe God invented the monkey because he was disappointed in man.”
Having grown tired of opening bananas with your feet, this year monkeys will use their feet to open other stuff; like film festivals. With the body hair of a Mediterranean waiter and the intelligence of, well, a Mediterranean waiter, the monkey is supposedly the missing link between man and beast. Mediterranean waiters are, however, merely the link between man and coffee. Monkeys should try not to be hot headed this year and should think through their options before acting. Remember that rash decisions make situations worse, (although rash cream makes acne better). Softee softee catchee monkey as they say, although these days it’s probably easier to use a trap – be wary of people carrying sharp attacking things. Unlike the many monkeys used in crash helmet tests, you’ll be able to keep your head by not losing your temper. Think on.

Rooster
(1957, 1969, 1981, 1993, 2005)
“A rooster is a cockerel for people who don’t like saying cock”
With the modern economy resulting in higher efficiency, the number of birds being killed by one stone is set to increase this year to three, making your annoying daybreak chorus a particularly dangerous hobby. Try not tasting so nice in curry and you may survive the year, but beware of losing your temper. Glorified chicken you may only be, but this year you need more than ever to calm down and think stuff through. No more running around like a headless chicken – you know it only upsets your mum. Don’t rely on intuition this year as yours is rubbish; try planning and thinking ahead and stuff will be alright.

Dog
(1958, 1970, 1982, 1994, 2006)
“A dog is a dog unless he is facing you; then he is Mr. Dog.”
With a leg at each corner, dogs are stable and reliable, yet – tragically – dafter than two particularly short, short planks. Pavlov made his dogs dribble when they heard a bell to prove just how daft they were. This year you will spend most of your time walking into rooms and forgetting what you were going in there for. Your professional life will be more successful than your personal, partly due to your strong work ethic and partly due to your ham fisted attempts to make beautiful love with people’s legs. Stop that. You can look forward to a year of pursuing a rewarding career, sticks, cars and rabbits. Whilst most domesticated dogs are good with children, in China they are also good with salad or baked potatoes. Not a bad year at all, so expect plenty of tail action in the wagging dept.

Pig
(1959, 1971, 1983, 1995, 2007)
“With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine.”
Good god, you really are a big fat and smelly wobble of lard, aren’t you? While the tiger is ‘proud’, the dragon ‘celestial’ and the dog ‘loyal’, you, Mr. Pig, are only ‘tasty’. If god had wanted us to be vegetarian he wouldn’t have made animals out of meat, a sentiment you illustrate all too perfectly. Last year was a whole twelve months of missed opportunities, probably because you were too busy filling your word-hole with food. Just stop it. This year will be equally as hard if you choose to dwell on the past instead of looking to the future. Should you make it through the next twelve months without becoming a hot filling breakfast, things will begin to look up. Try this year not to judge yourself too harshly. There’s a whole world of people out there willing to do it for you.

Rat
(1960, 1972, 1984, 1996, 2008)
“Squirrels: rats with good public relations.”
Leather tailed purveyors of mischief, this equine year will see these odious sewer-dwelling miscreants trying to dodge Lady Fate’s size 11 Nikes as she tries to leave a lasting impression on poor Mr. Rat’s spine. Make no mistake – not a good year for anything that snacks on poo. Beware of false opportunity; that chunky chunk of cheese could make for a tasty meal, but more than likely it’s housed within a cunning trap. Rats can’t vomit, which is why rat poison works so well. Me? I prefer air rifles. Watch the little buggers explode, that’s what I say. Avoid risks, watch out for accidents and try to avoid disagreements. More than likely you’ll have job problems this year, but that’s more to do with your stench and beady eyes than the economy. You’re also in for a torrid time sex-wise. Good; there’s too many of you as it is.

Ox
(1961, 1973, 1985, 1997, 2009)
“The ox will plunge through mud, swim over streams, dive into thickets and he will eat almost anything”
After last years terrible outbreaks of Foot in Mouth disease, Oxen are muchly in demand this year. You will star in two films; Her and Noah, which will catapult you to international stardom. Play your cards right and sometime this year you could be shacked up with Miley Cyrus. Everyone else has been. Guard against complacency, mind, as you are only an ox after all. Don’t do anything stupid and, career-wise, this could be your year. Yippee.

Tiger
(1962, 1974, 1986, 1998, 2010)
“Anyone can grab a tiger by the balls, but it takes a real man to squeeze!”
Voted the animal Most Likely To Be Killed By People With Guns whilst at school, tigers will this year realise that in fact they do make quite nice rugs. To this end, they’ll stop eating and lay spread eagled on their own dining room floors until told to stop playing silly buggers by their mums. Yellow and black and stripy like the bee, yet slightly heavier and unable to fly, tigers will enjoy an upturn in their careers, something they will achieve by not becoming extinct just yet. Spurred on by this success they will learn to control their temper and have a higher appreciation of the arts. If you can cease that annoying habit of marking your territory with urine, love could be on the cards. Be wary of people jealous of your good fortune and expect to dole out a few maulings along the way.

Rabbit
(1963, 1975, 1987, 1999, 2011)
“It’s open season on wabbits”
I once had a rabbit. Got killed by a cat. Cat died of flu. Flu under a bus. Poetic justice? Not really – it doesn’t rhyme. Tired of staying in the hutch and bouncing bones with a succession of randy rabbit partners, the normally laidback bunny is about to spend a whole year being what Bleiber-like wannabe’s would describe as ‘jail bunny’. An increasingly active social life will finally see those laboratory make-up tests paying off as your expertly applied mascara will make sure you have no trouble finding new and exciting people to root, while your e-cig habit will mark you out as one cool carrot cruncher. Remember, however, that when it comes to sex, it’s quality that counts, not quantity, unless you’re a man-rabbit, in which case quantity and quality are pretty much the same. Go out and enjoy this year.

Dragon
(1964, 1976, 1988, 2000, 2012)
“Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.”
This year people are more likely to be aware that dragons don’t really exist, which will make applying for credit cards that bit more difficult. Last year wasn’t too clever for dragons, and unless you stop sulking and get your proverbial shit together, this year will be another succession of St. George types trying to pop a sword in yo’ ass. Celestial and regal, Lady Luck will nevertheless once again flip you the finger of ill fortune, so you’ll need to be careful; learn the lessons of other dragons by staying away from the whole eating virgins thing and remember that if you hang around with young boys you’ll be called Puff. Not the best of years can be expected, but you’re a dragon so who cares. Would you rather be a sheep?

Snake
(1965, 1977, 1989, 2001, 2013)
“Even snakes are afraid of snakes.”
Curiously warm skinned legless lizards will find the next dozen months a period of change. Snakes in the grass will be presented with opportunities to travel but trouser snakes are in for a torrid time as they’ll find precious little in the way of hot lovin’. Word on the street has it that fanged belly crawlers could be in a for some ill health over the next few months, which will cheer everyone else up as no one really likes snakes except when their in cages. Or soup. Feather boa’s will be up to their necks in it, (sorry…) while the only hissing coming from you this year will be the air escaping from your slowly deflating aspirations. Unlucky.

Disclaimer: the very fact that we need to add a disclaimer should alert you to the fact that there are people amongst us right now who are empty-headed enough to put much store by these horoscopes. Don’t; they’re all quite obviously made up years ago.

Cocaine Mail

It began on what seemed like any other normal, if chaotic, day; the office was buzzing with people writing, creating and designing the next edition of bc magazine. The building didn’t have mail boxes, nor did our office boast an external mailbox, so, as usual, the postman dropped the day’s mail on the reception counter sometime around mid-morning. It was a typical day’s delivery: cheques, invoices, press releases and promotional mail from companies angling for us to write about them and, on that February day in 2010, a Hong Kong Post oversized A4 PostPack envelope, the type with bubble wrap protecting the contents. Something you can buy at any post office – nothing exceptional.

It was such a normal day, I don’t even remember what I was doing before opening the mail. A PostPack wouldn’t usually stand out, we often received press releases in them – but this one was different; it was marked “Return to Sender” from Canada with our office address stuck on the back. I didn’t recall sending anything to Canada and couldn’t think why anyone else in the office would have, so was a little curious about what the package might contain. To give edge to the mystery, it was covered in custom stamps and scribbles from the various postal sorting offices it had passed through on its journey from Hong Kong to Canada and back.

Peeling back the sticky flap revealed something wrapped in what looked like carbon paper. That, too, was not quite as unusual as it might seem – PR companies and advertisers send the media all sorts of things wrapped in all sorts of ways. Not knowing if the item was fragile, I pulled it carefully from the PostPack and set it on my desk before tearing open the carbon paper wrap.

Sitting there on my desk was an A4 sized vacuum-sealed plastic package full of white powder.

Now, beyond the talcum found in a handy containers in supermarkets, my knowledge of white powder was limited to what I’d seen on TV and film screens: wraps smaller than sugar cubes passed furtively from dealer to buyer or blocks heavily wrapped in plastic to be sliced and split by police making a bust.

Yet there on my desk was a vacuum-sealed package of what looked suspiciously like cocaine. Thoughts flash through my mind: It looks like cocaine, but it can’t be… Why would there be a pack of cocaine on my desk? …Why is someone sending cocaine through the post? …It can’t be cocaine… Best call the police to be sure!

It’s quite surreal phoning the police to tell them you think you’ve just received a block of cocaine in the post, would they please send someone around. Not something I thought I’d ever be doing. It’s even more surreal when assorted police and customs officials descend to poke and prod at the ominous package before spiriting it away. We gave statements and expected answers but were left in limbo waiting to learn what exactly was in the package. A couple of days later the suspense lifted – a customs officer phoned to say yes it was cocaine, high quality cocaine, and worth about $2 million on the streets in the Canada and the US. The package had revealed no fingerprints and the carbon paper had been used to fool the custom’s X-ray machines into showing up a solid object in the PostPack.

Beyond the shock and disbelief was a sort of “What the fuck! These things only happen in the movies!” – but that, we thought, was the end of a curious incident that provided the office with no end of chatter and debate… until the next PostPak arrived a couple of weeks later. Complete with “Return to Sender” sticker but from a different address in Canada. And a week or so later, yet another…

The packages were followed by phone calls; multiple call-and-hang-ups to the office and the staff mobiles. Thugs – for want of a better way to describe them – appeared, loitering around for hours in the corridors of our office building, standing there-say nothing.

As our lease expired I looked to move the office to a more secure building, only for our new landlord to be threatened even before we moved in – I never did discover how they came across the new address. So I arranged to collect the mail at the post office, and over the following months we handed PostPack after PostPack to the police. I lost count in the end, 15 or 16 I think it was; the final straw, which prompted a desperate plea to the police to intercept the packets before they arrived in our mail box, was finding three “RTS” PostPacks in it: $6 million worth of cocaine.

After that we never received another – I don’t know if they stopped coming or whether the police did intercept them. Even now, three years later, I struggle to make sense of it. The questions remain unanswered: If each PostPack could so easily go undetected through four sets of customs in and out of Hong Kong and Canada, why do people carry drugs on planes? Who has that much cocaine to keep sending it to addresses in Canada; surely the buyer would complain about not receiving his product? One package, maybe two – but why keep sending it month after month? That’s the curious part, the bit that doesn’t make sense, and I can’t fit the pieces of the story together to create one that makes sense.

And, disappointingly the police informed us we weren’t eligible to receive a reward for handing in the drugs.

Elaine Chow: 14 March, 1986 – 27 October, 2005

In loving memory of Elaine Chow who committed suicide in the early hours of the 27 October 2005. Gone but never forgotten!

Elaine was a wonderful, vibrant and happy woman, who brought joy to everyone she met. Her smile could and would brighten the sunniest and dreariest of days.

Her response to my full-time job offer during her internship was “You mean, you want to
pay me to go out and eat”. Writing that here and remembering her radiant smile when she said it, has managed to bring a smile to my face – even through the massive cloak of despair that I still feel at her death.

And while tears run down my cheeks, and my heart breaks as my mind replays the images of Elaine falling to her death – so fast yet in slow motion as my brain cannot process the truth of what it sees and my legs will never be moving fast enough to reach her… The pain of those memories never seems to fade, but nor I hope will the memories of her smile and the joy she infused to all around her. RIP Elaine.

Elaine Chow 3 people a day, on average, commit suicide in Hong Kong, it’s the unseen killer, if you know someone who’s talking (even jokingly) of it get them help/talk to them. If you’re thinking of suicide, please please talk to someone first.
Samaritans Hong Kong: 2896-0000 www.samaritans.org.hk

Category: bc magazine